Half The Man I'm Meant To Be?

I never take baths! Always a shower. But a number of times recently I've elected to take the "slower route" to my ablutions - having a bath!

I've been caught up reading books recently - Again something I don't usually have much time to do. Business man, father, husband, leader in the church... you know how it goes! Everything is pulling on me demanding a piece of me and my time. That's why I haven't had time to take baths...until now! Now that I've created space in my life by resigning from the company I've found more time... although I have also discovered that, if I'm not careful, it is easy to let it leak away doing useless things!

The books I've been reading are...

"Surprised By The Voice Of God" by Jack Deere

"Good Morning Holy Spirit" by Benny Hinn

and "The Shack" by William P Young

I have read "Surprised" before, about 12 years ago. I decided to re-read it because I found it useful back then, and with everything that is going on in my life now I thought "Wouldn't do any harm to re-read it now." I feel I have a deeper knowledge and understanding in my faith now than when I read it the first time, so I thought that re-reading it might bring new things to light that I hadn't noticed or understood the last time around.

I was only a couple of chapters into "Surprised" when I began watching the "Florida Outpouring" on the God Channel (Sky TV channel 760 / 761 from about 9pm every night!) - Fascinating to watch what is going on there and clearly some people are genuinely being healed! Anyway, Todd Bentley the guy who is leading this revival referred to Benny Hinn's book - "Good Morning Holy Spirit!" and my wife Carrie said, "I've got that!" She went and got it out and gave it to me. I started reading it the next day, instead of 'Surprised' and found myself drawn into it.

A day or two later, I went away on business, staying in a hotel in Birmingham overnight and took 'Good morning' with me. I was gripped by it! I was intrigued and fascinated by the relationship Hinn has - a close intimate relationship - with the Holy Spirit of God. Unfortunately I left it in my room the day I checked out! So, I phoned and asked them to post it to me which they did... but I felt stranded without it - like I was in the midst of a question, but not sure what the question was.

A few days later, Sunday 15th June was Father's Day and my family bought me "The Shack" as part of my father's day pressie. I immediately started reading it. I'd heard that it was flying off the shelves in the bookshops.

I found myself even more gripped by this story! Interesting for me because I normally enjoy factual (biographies, etc) rather than fictional books. I finished it within 3 days fitting it in around any work, chores, family stuff, etc., whenever I could. I was amazed at how Young expressed the character of God, Father, Son and Holy Spirit - Trinity, three-in-one. I found it profound how he described the relationship between each of the trinity personalities of God, and also how they each related to the human character in the tale, called Mack. In fact, I also enjoyed Mack's struggles and perceptions as he interacted with each of the Godhead personalities. It is a wonderfully gentle, yet powerful book - which when you consider the plot, which is harrowing and uneasy to read at times, is quite a statement!

I think there were one or two points in 'The Shack' that I felt uncomfortable with 'theologically', but my overall impression was that I wanted others to consider the nature of God in the way I had when I had read that book. I think that it was quite a spiritual experience reading it!

Almost with disappointment I finished 'The Shack' and now I'm back with Benny, picking up on where I left off with "Good morning".

After my visit to the physio this a.m., I came home hot and sweaty, so elected to have another bath so that I could read some more. Under the sub-title "Following His Voice" (p72) Hinn points to Romans 8 v 5:

"Those who live according to the sinful nature have their minds

set on what that nature desires; but those who live in

accordance with the Spirit have their minds set on what the Spirit desires."

I don't think I would have uderstood that verse in anywhere near the same way 6 months or a year ago like I do now! I can make my choices and decisions in life 'according to the sinful nature' - i.e. in my own strength and wisdom, OR... I can make those decisions through consultation and close relationship with God - Father, Son and Holy Spirit! I've done the latter on occasions. But what if I were to let God guide and direct me in ALL things? About what work to do, about what to do this evening, about what food to buy, about which route to drive from A to B? Hmmm... all sorts of possibilities begin to open up!

What I've realised is that I'm only being half (if that!) the man that God created me to be. He created me in his image - that is to say, to reflect Him and his nature. He has given me a spiritual side that he wants me to express and exercise that part of me. I have (I believe) lots of spiritual potential - plenty of room for growth - growing into the person that God had intended me to be.

A few lines later on the same page, Hinn refers to the "one great question" that he was carrying with him and asking God - "How can I really know you?" I found myself wondering, as I lay in the bath, "Is there any greater question that I can ask than that one?"

As I ask it, it leads me into a deeper knowledge and understanding of God. As I ask it, He reveals more of himself to me and as I come to know Him more, I will grow to fulfil the potential he has placed in me - I won't be able to help myself!